Unraveling a Controversy

There seems to be a stench in the air.

I don't know where this fowl wind has come from or for how long it will stay but I am certain in one thing:

THIS TOO SHALL PASS!

I'm just going to put it out there... I'm a knitter! I am not plain nor am I simple, though some may percieve me this way it simply is not true.

However... In my complexity I feel it is very vital for the general public to understand a few things that are simple and plain about me, my knitting and the knitting community.

I'll start with ME.

I believe it is important for you to know that I am created by GOD.

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

psalm 139:13-14

I, Me, My being was knit together by my Creator. God used a big long strand of material(if you are unfamiliar, it's called DNA-the very molecules that determine everything about us that makes each person unique) twisted it in intentional patterns, forming it, into not a random creation, but a purposeful masterpiece of His hands. I will praise and glorify my Creator because He made me wonderfully. His work is marvelous and this I know full well.

My Lord created me with a talent for creation.

When I was eight or nine my mother taught me how to crochet. For fifteen or sixteen years I have been crocheting. For the same amount of time I have wanted to know how to knit. This past year I taught myself, (after I forgot what my mother had taught me about it) and now I am a very fluent knitter. It has become my new passion. My new art. This form of creation excites me like hot rods and convertibles excite men, like shopping malls excite teenagers, toddlers and candy, babies and bottles.

So I hope you are not missing the amount of time and with what excitement I have been anticipating knitting.... 15-16 years!! And this is only what I can remember.

If anyone knows me well they would know that I love to cuddle. Excluding a person from this equation I love to curl up in a nice warm blanket and not move. I love to be cozy and comfortable, like a giant hug. What better way to make this a constant state of being then to have a hobby in which you are making things that will do exactly that before they are even finished I ask you. Come on I dare you, tell me another one!

And it is not only the actual act of knitting that excites and fascinates me, I love the animals it comes from.

bunnies:

llamas:

goats:

sheep:

worms:

okay I will admit i am not excited over worms, but i do love silk!

and did you know it can be plants too!

cotton:

soy:

sugar cane:

just to name a few.

Then there is the feel of loose wool, cashmere right off the animal, the smell, of the fresh air and the farm, not the chemical dyes at Wal-mart.

The feel of the fabrics between your fingers. The mesmerizing process of it being spun onto a wheel by hand as it turns into the actual strands.

And dying, OH THE POSSIBILITIES!!!!

I love walking into a yarn store. There is simply nothing like it.

Before you even walk in you can see yarn yarn glowing in all it's radiant colors right through the windows.

Colorful window displays and adorable puns hanging over the doorway....

that always make you giggle as you walk in...

And then for the grand entrance:

the smells envelopes you, the warmth is invigorating, the colors are stimulating and the smiles from not only the clerks but every customer who is equally excited to be there and instantly, with out explanation, understands completely how big your smile really is on the inside, this experience is like coming home.

And I can tell you that this experience is exactly the same if you walk into a yarn store in Italy, not speaking a lick of Italian, it will not alter your experience in the least. In fact sometimes it enhances the experience as you both laugh hysterically attempting to communicate about color, weight, amount, end product, who it is for, etc, etc .

And the knitting store is the only store where I do not mind a sales clerk jumping on me the very moment I set foot in the door, because now I have a new friend and we have just started a relationship that is low maintenance (by this I mean every time I visit the yarn store, we talk about anything yarn related, don't get me started on that list!), but this new relationship is entirely fulfilling.

Now you know a little bit about me, knitting and why I like it soo much. So here is the point in time where I am going to reveal a bit about my knitting, my biggest pet peeve (knitting related) and something about the knitting community, although most of the above could be applied to most knitters.

I do not know in what order I will share them though so lets just see how it all unravels...shall we?

Now I have come to a conclusion that there are two kinds of people amongst those who do not knit.

Before I explain the breakdown of this community please read my disclaimer:

I want you to know that my expressions are not personal to you the reader(if you are not a knitter), they are general as I have observed this generally. So please do not take offense. Also, in my expression I am not, nor have I ever been offended that the non-knitters, as I will hence forth call them, are dis-interested. I do not expect them to be. But i do expect you to understand that I will mostly likely not get all jazzed up about your hot rod, mall trip, candy or bottle unless yarn is somehow incorporated.

Now that that is out of the way we can get down to business.

There are two kinds of people in the non-knitter community. And yes they have their own community because there truly is a population count for non-knitters, i know.....it's unfathomable!

The first, don't care enough...let me explain;

These are the "non-knitters" who think it is fascinating, uncomprehending how we can manage this complicated task of wrapping yarn around a needle, want to or have tried to knit but for un-numbered reasons didn't stick to it, and then there are those who want hand-knits but don't care enough to make them themselves. These are people who simply don't care enough for the dream to because a reality. It's just a fact of life and I get it.

and then there are the ugly ones. And I can say that because they didn't even read this far. They are onto a much more exciting task of making sure all their hammers are hanging properly in their garage! This group;

THEY JUST DON'T CARE AT ALLLLLLLLLLL!

Now I think my point is clear and obvious there but i will elaborate, as this may be confusing if out of boredom they are still reading and have not yet realized that I am talking about them.

No remorse or concern for how they are perceived by knitters, rarely a sensitivity to the genuine joy that knitters get from their craft, and an internal sense of superiority. These people don't care to hear, read, or talk about knitting or anything yarn related.

*knitters, don't waste your breath!

They often become a tad bitter when forced into a social situation with a knitter and will respond with either jokes about how ridiculous knitting is, attempt to make the knitter explain their joy over this habit or they will begin to tell anyone willing to listen what they think they know about knitting and in particular the knitter.

Who by the way will be able to keep her cool as this fool proceeds to embrace themselves because she has her knitting to re-leave the tension. Besides she knows that they are completely and utterly WRONG!

Now does a man take things apart and put them back together because it is broken? Sometimes, but most of the time it's for pure enjoyment and of course the occasional advance in knowledge that they store and will use for later projects.

It is the same with knitting. Sometimes a project needs repair or revision, but mostly(I know it's shocking, but..) we just like to knit, and as we do, we gain understanding of the structure of the garment for future creations.

Why do people have more then one computer game, video game, book, or TV show to watch? Because they get bored with just one.

It is the same with knitting. We have more then one project going because we get bored with only one.

And now for my biggest pet peeve(knitting related).

"Knitters knit because they are bored"

This simply makes me cringe and want to scratch your eyes out slowly with my dullest needle. It is simply not true! I want you, right now if you believe the above statement to be true to go skin an alligator and have yourself a suit made(we know you won't make it yourself) because you need some thicker skin.

If I knit when we are talking, it is because I can knit while I talk.

It is not because you are a highly unaccomplished conversationalist.

It is not that I think my knitting is more exciting then you.

It is not that I am not listening.

And it is not that I am wishing I were somewhere else.

It is simply that I am able to knit and talk at the same time.

It is in no way a reflection of you.

~We knit on a bus because we are bored

~We knit in line because we are bored

~We knit waiting in a doctors office because we are bored

~We knit when we can think of nothing better to do(which is almost never by the way cause there is always knitting) because we are bored

~We knit while the laundry is going because we are bored

We are not bored by conversation, we simply can, so we do.

Now with this said, if you do not understand the full joy and complete ability(God gave women) to multi-task, lacking nothing, and have not yet acquired your adult skin *see reference to baby/adult teeth-chapter 5*, then I do not want to offend you so I will put down my needles with out lament but at some point please in return, spend an equal amount of time understanding that

knitters do not knit because we are bored!!!